different paths

i was going to blog about my craft to do list but something told me i needed to get something off my chest instead.

you see, i've been thinking a lot about what if's. what if this happened. what if that happened.

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i know it's silly to think about stuff like that. but it happens. and sometimes the best way to get over it, is to just get it all out there.

so here's my what if issue at the moment.

do you ever wonder why certain people come in to your life and then are gone just as quickly?

what if we had stayed in touch after high school. after college? what if we hadn't said such hurtful words to each other? what if i had apologized sooner? what if you had understood where i was coming from? what if we had been less selfish? what if boys hadn't gotten in the way? what if we had celebrated each other's differences instead of disrespecting them? what if we had tried harder? what if we had told the truth? what if we could go back and change things?

i know asking these questions is pointless. you can't change the past. and most of me is very ok with that. i wouldn't be who i am and where i am today if things had gone differently. i'm so very appreciative of what i have in life and who i'm spending it with.

and some things happen that you just cannot control. death. divorce. illness. and those things change your life as well and make you wonder a whole different list of what ifs.

i just can't help but wonder sometimes what if. (i think that might be a woman thing!)

would we still be best friends, the four of us? would we live closer together? would we have attended each other's weddings? would our kids be best friends? would we have stayed in touch? would we know more about each other now than then? would we talk every day, tell each other everything? would you attend more family functions? would i babysit your kids? would we sit and chat about blogs? would we shop together? would we vacation together? would we go to our high school or college reunion together?

it's weird, at the moment in time when things are changing, you don't really see or think about the what ifs that might creep up later in life. and i consider myself lucky because i don't think much about them now a days. but every once in a while i just have to wonder. i let myself for a day or less (never more!). and then as quickly as the what ifs come, they leave. and i thank God for everything and everyone i have.

i'm so lucky and blessed every day that it's silly to wonder what if. because what's now is perfect!

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weekend recap

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no work friday. disaster blaster. silent auction wins. cactus bar-wear. sleeping in. running errands. cleaning house. dog walking. dinner and a movie date. new workout. new recipe. late night chat/snuggle. back to work.

nothing remotely exciting happened this weekend but there was so fun had. i've decided that this quote is perfect for my life right now. i'm always wanting more, more, more. but sometimes what you have is enough (and perfect!).

wishes: all things nautical

i'm loving anything and everything nautical right now.

if i had it my way, i'd own a beach house and fill it with all kinds of nautical stuff. and i don't want all that crap with shells all over it, either. i mean, i love shells but i think they're a little overrated.

here's what i'm looking for in my nautical house wears...

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and you know i need to look the part or it just doesn't count.

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and of course i'll need one of these...

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feel free to take a look at the rest of my nautical inspirations here!

friday's fabulousness

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because of my surprise day off, today's fab is coming to you a little differently.

i'm going to give you a my fab list of things that MUST get done today!

1. i am going to spin class at 9:15 am instead of 5:30 am simply because i can (infact, i'm probably there while you're reading this. that's weird. don't think about my exercising right now, as it's not my most glam part of the day!). it's awesome to sleep in when you should be at work, isn't it!

2. this is where i'll be most of the day, as i have tons of projects to do (which i'll let you in on soon!). but at least my sewing area is cuter and my itunes will play all day while the dog naps on my feet under the desk! and you can bet i'll be consuming a lot of black cherry koolaid (made with splenda=0 ww points!). and maybe some chocolate. maybe.

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3. the house must get cleaned today. having this day off allows me to actually enjoy my entire weekend without any chores!

4. i'm going to cook an elaborate dinner. seriously. i'm talking three or more courses here (ok, that might be a lie!).

maybe we'll start with this...

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and for the middle...

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and we'll end it with this...

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and then i'll have to do number one all over again.

5. this involves a lot of things. first...

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and alot of them. grocery, hair appointment, oldnavy, target, post office, dmv, bank, dog barkery, wedding gift shopping, birthday gift shopping, thrifting etc.

and i hope to be looking like this while doing it all

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a girl can dream, right?!

update: weight watchers

i haven't updated y'all on the ww front in a while. not because i jumped ship or because i've fallen down and can't get back up. actually it's just the opposite. i'm doing well. still going slow and steady wins the race path! doing things healthy and smart. changing for life, and that's the way i want this weight loss thing to happen for me.

but i've come to the realization that i'm just LARGE.

yes, i just admitted that i'm a large person.

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let me explain so you don't try to form an intervention to help me with my low self esteem.

i've come up with a mental list (which i'll now but down on digital paper for the world to see) of what makes me a large person.

1. there's the obvious factor that i'm carrying a few extra pounds. and while i've lost a total of 32 (!) of those extra lbs. i still have quite a few to lose.

2. i have a very large voice. i'm talking about volume in the sense of audio and amount of usage. i talk a lot and i love to be loud. i can't help it. i blame it on growing up with too many siblings and having to yell to be heard. and i could literally talk your head off if you let me. about anything. i'm the person you don't really want to sit next to on an airplane (but only if i'm by myself). i must get that from my fatherly, kevin!

3. i have very large cheeks. no matter how much weight i lose in my face, i just can't get rid of them. at least my kiddos will be cute with those pinchable cheekers, right?

4. i think i have large teeth. i'm probably the only person that thinks this, in fact travis is in love with my teeth. being an orthodontists son, it's one of the first things he notices at when he meets someone.

5. i have a very large...chest. good thing there's no pic for this one. no one wants to see that. well, i know someone but this is a family blog!

6. my personality is pretty large and you probably love me or hate me. i'm ok with that. as i've gotten older it doesn't bother me but as a teen i always needed people to like me but i've since decided it's quality over quantity!

7. my hair is large. this pic doesn't even do it justice. i should show you right after i blow it dry and haven't brushed through but this natural look will have to do for now!

8. i like BIG stuff. ie. my 80 lb dog, my 6'4" bf, large jewelry, large purses, the big suv i drive, etc. i mean, come on, i'm a texas gal and everything is bigger (and better) in texas. right?

about the only non-large thing about me is my height. seriously i wish i had about 4 more inches.

i'm in no way getting down on myself. i love who i am and who i'm becoming each day. it's nice to sit down and take an honest look at yourself and decide what it is that you don't like and change it and what you do like and embrace it!

*please don't judge my low quality mac photo booth pics. or my dirty hair and freshly washed, ie. super shiny face! thanks.

pinterest

have you heard of pinterest?

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i've been pinning for months now. i don't know why i didn't think to blog about it before, but alas here it is now.

this website is beyond amazing.

were you the person that would get ideas online and have no where to store them (i mean, my brain can only hold so much info!). i used to store stuff in folders on my desktop. but that was getting ridic. so, que the web gods. they come up with a digital inspiration board-esque website to do all the storing for me!

right now you have to be invited to join pinterest but i can totally do that for you! just shoot me an email or put your email in the comment section and i'll totally invite you (and make you be my new bff!).

you can check out my boards and pins here!

new hair. new me?

i need something new. i'm thinking new hair. i'm also thinking a cut might be the right thing to do. i'm thinking shoulder length with a few face layers and keeping my bangs (for the time being). here are some ideas...

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Source: google.com via Ashley on Pinterest

and i'm maybe thinking about going stawberry blonde. as i get older my hair is turning a little more red (thanks dad and gma cheryl!) and i just haven't embraced it yet. but i'm thinking a color change might be a little easier than a cut at this point!

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so what do you think. serioulsy, i need opinions before i do something drastic!