day 10: my fears

to be honest, i'm kind of afraid of a lot of things. not openly on most of them but they are still there. i'll give you my top three!

1. BIRDS. i'm so afraid of them. they creep me out with their little beady eyes and their sharp beak. i was bit by a goose as a child and it's stuck with me ever since. i will avoid them at any cost. when josh is around i will make him chase them away and he kindly obliges! in fact here's a little story for you: i was once at target in dallas and there were birds every where. i think there were two or three on my driver side of the car and i couldn't get in the door. i freaked out and decided that i couldn't just walk over there and scare them away so i climbed through the passenger seat to get to the driver's seat. silly? yes. necessary? yes.

2. BEING ALONE. and no i don't mean i can't do anything by myself because i actually like my alone time. but, i have this underlying fear that i will end up all alone, old and gray and i can't stand the thought. i try not to think about it too much but sometimes it just pops up in your head. i don't think this will really happen to me but the fear is there for sure.

3. DEATH. i'm not afraid to die. i'm afraid of the people i love dying. i just don't want them to leave me (which ties in great with number 2 up there!). i can't imagine life without my family and friends and if i lost them, i don't know that i could move on.

while i try not to let my fears affet my life too much sometimes it's out of my hands. i think some fears are rational. fear helps me make good decisions and sometimes it hinders me from doing things, but i'm ok with my fears for now!